Venting novally?

“what do we do with a drunken sailor?”

27.04.2020

First mate Unicorn wearily gallops and enters the Captain’s cabin.

“Captain! Captain! Captain! Unicorn panics.

“…hmm ”Captain Magical replies. Half-asleep, half-hungover and half-dressed in an animal onesie.

Incoherent neighs followed by“… ’May’ day, ‘May’ day, Captain. It’s time!”. Unicorn claps hoofs and stammers into a corner “ahhhhmegedon!” then, proceeds to roll back-forth-back and forward.

Magical waves his mitts about, as if searching for something, staggers.

“Nooo! Not the bottle!” wide-eyed Unicorn stumbles, shimmy-ing, along the ground.

“Not-a-problem-o” Magical sways towards a cubby filled with glistening bottles of devilish delights.

Unicorn staring quizzical.

“I’m ‘blind’ anyways, be a superstar, please help me with my ‘blind spot’ babes” Magical sluuuurrrrrs.

Unicorn astonished at this discovering. “You’re blind????????????????????????? How did you see the island? What Captain is Blind? Why is our Captain blind?”.

Magical, soothing Unicorn, petting. “… no one asked”.

Silence fell upon the situation. If silence could fall, this silence could be described as a runny tap dripping , drip, drip, drip. Thankfully, the tap is part of an already establish drainage system that could be accurately named bath/shower/toilet/bide room.

Magical perks ears.

“Sailors on deck! Call in the positioning”, Magical mummers a few names. Moments later… after the crew gets the download. Blind Captain.

They all call “Technician Cuddle!”

Cuddle approaches Captain’s cabin, hearing “blind… captain?” Upon assessing the information, private measures of excusing oneself of leadership would be advised, that addresses balance of direction.

Magical and the crew excited at the arrival of Cuddles.

“Cuddle!” they flounder about and celebrate. “Our Captain is blind. What should we do???”

All the while, Captain Magical sips a little here and there, scratching chin, as this story unravels.

Cuddle looking left, then, right. Replies with a short and direct “There is a technical-engineering-machinery issue I’m already working on. Since there’s a few of you, I’m sure you’ll find a solution, best wishes”. Then, disappears in a blink of an eye (or for the Captain Two shakes of a lambs tail).

Speaking of… two shakes of a lambs tail.

Unicorn and Crew race to Navigation. “Navigator G.O.A.T!”

Navigator flicks the ‘busy’ light and presses ‘unlock door’. “... baa?” unamused at the joke.

“Our Captain is blind!” emotional squealing and squirming followed by trembling-flailing arms.

Door closes.

Unicorn curls into a donut. Squirms on the ground.

“Medic, Medic!” crew whimpers.

Medic tends to Unicorn wheeling the bed, of soft, fluffy toys and pillows, away towards the kitchen.

Navigator Roomba, skips silently-swiftly-ninjaing, the directions and map on the display located on the centre ceiling above the grandfather clock, next to the granny clock, opposite the cuckoo clock, perpendicular to an egg timer, angled towards a projector for sparkly lights or for a huge, humongous, overexaggerated time display – like in batman.

Medic Meow proceeds to comfort Unicorn.

Thank you for reading this (I'm surprised we've both reached the end too!)